Mar 25, 2013

a new spring

photo credit: Gazelle Valley Park,

As an update to my previous post, at this past week's appointment I got to speak with the other MFM in more depth about the steroid shots. There are two MFMs who run the prevention of prematurity clinic, so I volley back in forth between them during my clinic visits. I think they are both really competent, and I appreciate having the two different perspectives.

In short, we've decided we will definitely do the shots at 28 weeks unless something changes in the mean time, in which case we would do them immediately. As Emily pointed out in her comment to my last post, Dr. W. said they work most effectively on more mature lung tissue, so from a lung maturation standpoint, they don't function optimally at 24-26 weeks. However, in this age group, they do decrease the likelihood of intraventricular hemorrhage (IVH), which in addition to the respiratory issues, is a major obstacle for micropreemies.

In the absence of any indication that I am going to deliver in the near future, she felt pretty strongly that it is best to optimize the lung maturation benefit we will get out of them and get good coverage during the 28-32 week window, which she sees as a more likely scenario than something catastrophic happening over the next few weeks. So I feel better having some resolution on that and I feel comfortable with our choice of waiting a few more weeks.

Baby girl is a bit of a chunker, which is great :) Last week her estimated weight was 1 lb. 9 oz., about a week ahead. Her other measurements put her in the 65% percentile for her gestational age. I am happy she is measuring a little big. I did my 1-hr GTT last week. I am a bit nervous about the results, because I didn't know I was doing the test and I had a couple of glasses of cranberry juice with breakfast before I drank the glucola.

I have a bad cold which is annoying, but it is nothing more than a nuisance. It felt really good passing V-day, but I will feel even better next week once we G-d willing pass 26 weeks and I am holding out for 28 weeks even more so. The outlook would still be quite bleak if our little girl was born this week, but still, reaching the point when there would at least be an attempt to intervene feels significant. I am hoping for this pregnancy to stay boring for quite a while longer!

I am also looking forward to March being over. February and March 2012 were two terrible months for us punctuated by complications, hospitalizations, and of course the loss of Aminadav and Naava. Since then, it has always felt to me like February and March were out to get us. Just one more week and we can kiss my dreaded season goodbye.

As the days get longer and warmer and we enter the spring holiday season, I remember the emptiness and hollowness of last spring. Most of all, I remember my empty empty arms after a winter spent gestating two vital little lives. This spring, I still carry that emptiness and hurt in my heart everywhere I go, but I feel thumps and spins and all sorts of acrobatics on the inside that I can't help but admit make feel hopeful and vital again. I guess you could say that finally I am expecting.


  1. So glad you were able to come to a decision that you're comfortable with!

  2. Glad to hear you're doing well and that you've found some peace over the steroid issue. It's a hard decision to be asked to make on behalf of your unborn child when you feel like the decision is so vitally important and you have little information to go on ie: "Do I FEEL like I'm going into labour anytime soon?". Too bad we don't all have a crystal ball! I'm pretty sure I know Dr. W. (she was the one who decided based on an ultrasound that it was time for Kaia to come out), and she definitely erred on the side of caution for me. Good luck and on to 28+ weeks!

  3. I'm glad to hear you are in good hands. For the health of your baby girl as much as your sanity. Step by step, you're getting there. Chag sameach. Talk soon.

  4. That last sentence is beautiful :)

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  6. I continue to root for you and Y and this pregnancy! I hope no news is good news...was a tiny bit worried not to have seen a post in a while but I hope you've just been super busy and everything is just going smoothly. I think your decision to do the steroids at 28 weeks was well-reasoned and a good choice. Hopefully Toronto is warming up and you are feeling well and Baby Growing is growing on target. Are you doing anything for Yom Haatzmaut? Husband has a bunch of work so no mangal for us :o( And it is always strange having Yom Hazikaron in chul. But I did my share of crying for balada lachovesh (never fails) and then I streamed the torch ceremony this afternoon :o) Chag Haatzmaut sameach!

  7. Thinking of you...hoping everything is ok...Remembering Aminadav and Naava.

  8. Wondering how you are... so quiet.

  9. Just thinking of you, hope all is well.

  10. I'm so sad to not hear from you and thinking the worst has happened. :-( Sending much care and support to you both.